Everybody always said ''til the day hell freezes over''. But has it ever freeze over? Contact me if you want to discuss anything hellfreezeover666@yahoo.com . Not that anybody actually read this blog. I'm just as lonely as ever. From a pathetic fool in HELL!!!

 
It's been a sad last few days, then again, what's new.

It all started Friday night. After dinner with some friends, I was withdrawing money from the ATM and got a phone call from her. She told me she didn't feel too good and wanted me to go pick her up. I of course gladly comply with her wish. But she was too disoriented to tell me where she is and I have to ask a co-worker (the one that she thought was cute and wish she have a big brother like that, she never said anything nice like that about me. sigh...) for the direction to the place. After picking her up and drove for about 30 seconds, she started complain about headache and dizziness. So I gave her water and IBuprofen. Still she couldn't sit the car for long. I parked my car near an empty parking lot and walk with her in circle for about 20 minutes before she's oriented enough to get back in the car. Then we went pick up her bag and phone from work and drove her home. Of course I weren't allow to talk about the ordeal with anyone. Well I guess that's expected. The next morning I had to wake up at 8:30 (on a Saturday!!!) and drove her to work to pick up her car so she could go to her tutoring job.

I thought after all the stuff I did, I was surely going to get a phone call of "thank you" or even better, a dinner during the weekend. But what was I thinking, I'm such an idiot. Of course she won't call me nor would she do anything remotely nice 'cause what I did is to be expected. But I obviously didn't think so, when she told me that she's going with her friends to our annual technical conference for lunch on Monday, I couldn't hold my anger any longer. All the rejection over the last few months just compiled up and basically exploded. And I let her know how I felt about the situation. But of course I'm a wimp and later during the day when she ask me if I was over with my anger (thru a page, not even wanting to talk to me), I basically told her it's my fault and I'll deal with it. Such a wimp... The only thing she could think of doing for me is to give me a chocolate, what a joke!!! And the worse thing is that I had to act as if nothing happen and still bring pearl tea to her and do all the nice stuff for her. sigh... I'm just such a wimp. So pathetic... Oh yeah, I called today about having dinner but she didn't pick up the phone. About a hour later, she not only called me twice and left a voice mail but also paged me once. Wow I guess she just want to make sure she responds to me. She's a bit worry about losing me as a friend, well atleast all the favors I did for her.
posted by HELL at 21:09